Sorry it's been so long friends, but we were waiting for the results of our 20 week appointment (which was actually at 19 1/2). We came in on two wheels as usual because the hospital is a good distance from our house... ok it's a long way. As a preventative measure we've made contact with the local sherriff's department to secure an escort just in case Jen's labor rushes on her like a linebacker and won't quit until the sherriff's deputy has delivered the baby in the back seat of his Crown Vic still a good 10 minutes from the hospital. Wait, that only happens in the movies anyway right? I mean she could labor for something crazy like 36 hours (love you Lindsay). In that case we could live in dern Vancouver, BC and still make it to the hospital in time to brush up on our breathing techniques and our teeth before the Dr. even arrives. I digress...
Because they were doing a sonogram, when we passed beyond the sacred door, we were greeted with a surprise... Instead of turning right just past the frilly leopard print shaded accent lamp... we went LEFT!! We kept our cool though and just followed. It just led into the sonogram room and the lady exchanged some greetings, but we were just like.... let's get to it. It was the normal sonogram lady and a "trainee". So the four (five) of us were in this small room about the size of a pantry and it must have contained the one vent that heated the whole doctor's office, because when she shut the door and turned out the lights, you immediately felt like a human sized chocolate chip cookie baking in a really big oven. Man it was hot... for me... I thought, if I'm hot, Jen's got to be on fire over there laying with her belly exposed and her lower back clinging to that funky tissue paper that they cover the beds with.
Anyway, the real tech lady got to work and she got her measurements and we heard the heartbeat and crown and rump and circumference and yadda yadda yadda. About ten minutes later she had printed out some pictures which can be seen above. (Grady already has a sweet face and a ridiculously long index finger) So just when we thought that we would get some fresh air the lady says, "Would you mind if our trainee took some measurements and marked some things off her chart?" What are you gonna say? At this point, I grabbed Jen's sweating hand. Trainee lady was in her final year of whatever sonogram school, but for real she needed to quit school and become one of those massage people outside of Penny's in the mall. She was beating up my wife and kid with that little nubby detector thing like the Cobras came down on karate kid. And for that matter, She was so so sssoooooo sslloowww and had to repeat everything. Oh man, Grady was totally squirmin doin umbilical cord somersaults and whatever else he could do to get that lady off of him.
Well, we did make it out alive, but not before we spent what felt like two hours in the sono-oven. All in all, we had a great checkup and the fast talking lady Dr. says everything with Grady is Great! Everything is developing perfectly and he weighs 11 ounces. I got to thinking about what we could compare him to just to get an idea and I thought.... ahh the partially eaten block of medium cheddar in our fridge.... Grady, we love you, our little 11 ounce human.